Monday, July 2, 2007

Transformers

If you didn't immediately think "AWESOME!" when you heard there was a Transformers live-action film coming out, you are either a girl, a fool, or a pessimist. In the case of the latter one, you have no business watching cartoons anyway, so shut up and leave. Now.

On a faraway planet named Cybertron, life exists not as anything biological or organic, but as something mechanical; what we might call "robotic", but much more complex. These robotic life-forms have the ability to "transform" between two forms: a humanoid robot mode and an alternate vehicle mode (anything from a car to a jet fighter). Two factions of "transformers" exist: the Autobots, who favor peace, and the evil Decepticons, who favor destruction. The Decepticons (inevitably) turn against the Autobots, and a civil war breaks out. This war lasts many eons, but finally reaches the point where the entire planet, both in resources and population, is nearly exhausted. The battle between the heroic Autobots and the evil Decepticons eventually reaches Earth, where the two factions discover Earth's massive natural resources, which would enable one side or the other to win the war.
And so begins "the Great War"; a long struggle between the forces of the Autobots and the Decepticons, with humanity caught in-between.

One particularly interesting and unique part of the Transformers saga is the fact that the transformers really have no reason to protect humanity. Humans are like ants to the towering, powerful, and technologically advanced Cybertronians. If they so choose, the transformers can easily squash the forces of mankind and take the planet's resources for themselves (and therefore win their ages-old conflict). However, the Autobots' leader—the wise, moral, and powerful Optimus Prime—states that "Freedom is the right of all sentient beings," thus the Autobots therefore side with humanity, even if it means potentially losing their war. The Decepticons, meanwhile, have no care for humanity, and will gladly kill or manipulate mankind for their own purposes. The Decepticons already outnumber and outgun the Autobots, so the decision of the Autobots to protect humanity is somewhere between a brave, moral move and a death sentence. This kind of heroism (and the conflict against the Decepticons' evil) is what makes the characters in Transformers great despite their lack of real depth.

The film stays mostly true to the original "feel" of the series. Staples of the animated series, such as the human characters and the Autobot HQ are gone (or at least altered), but the basics are the same. Aside from the (mildly deep) moral conflict, however, the Transformers film is rather devoid of any sort of moral message, focusing on action, incredible special effects, and humor. When I say "incredible special effects", I mean INCREDIBLE. This movie is like watching Jurassic Park with machines.


Steve Jablonsky's musical score is absolutely wonderful, with memorable themes and a kind of sweeping orchestral power that's rarely heard in modern cinema outside of fantasy epics like The Lord of the Rings and Star Wars. On rare occasions, rock music breaks in, giving a much needed break of fun (notably during a very fun chase scene).
    This film is really a live-action “upgrading” of a cartoon. It has a somewhat cartoony feel, with giant robots walking around and acting like humans. The amazing visual effects make the transformers' incredible mobility totally believable, but the situations and dialogue are somewhat Saturday morning-esque. If you walk into the film expecting a sci-fi Saving Private Ryan, quickly slap yourself and pretend you’re eight years old again. The film’s plot and dialogue is not realistic in the least; it's just an amazingly cool cartoon. While it's true that real-life combatants don't face each other one-on-one, spouting lines such as “It’s just you and me… One shall stand, one shall fall,” the heroes of Saturday morning cartoons certainly do. While these situations and lines may seem unrealistic, they serve as a kind of animated poetry, translating the overarching moral issues and character motivations into a simple, visual format.
    Transformers may not impress those who don't appreciate the “fun” feel of cartoons, and it will certainly not impress cynics or pessimists. To fully enjoy the film, one must suspend their reliance on the rigid ways of the world, and see the film for what it truly is:

    Photorealistic giant robots smashing things.

    In all honestly, while the humor may hold the interest of those uninterested in the spectacular action or the sheer coolness of transforming robots, any viewer can likely decide whether or not they will enjoy the film just by deciding if the above quote appeals to them.

    At the same time, there are plenty of problems in the film. The budget was a bit low for such an undertaking, and the only way to make the Transformers look real was to severely limit their screentime. This means that the plot does not truly begin to revolve around the bots themselves until halfway into the movie, and even then they remain strangely off-camera.

    What we get instead is divided between government drama, military action, and silliness involving the character of Sam Witwicky.
    The government story isn't terrible, but it's definitely a little pointless and silly. The military action is, in large part, pretty great. Sam's story is loosely connected to the transformers' tale, but most of it revolves around his desperate struggles to find a hot girlfriend. Sam is moderately relatable, but he comes off as extremely shallow for most of the film. He feels rather pointless and shoved in.

    The "female love interest" of the movie is Mikaela Banes, played poorly (or perhaps perfectly?) by Megan Fox. It's obvious that Mikaela only exists in the movie to be the hot chick; there's no reason for her character to exist whatsoever. She's seemingly even more shallow than Sam, less likable, and entirely useless.

    Finally, there's a certain amount of infantile humor in Transformers that's just inexcusable. Have you ever wanted to see a giant robot urinate oil on a guy? Do you love masturbation jokes? Then you'll love this. Also, get out of my sight. You make me sick.
    Some of the humor isn't offensive; it's just bad. One scene involves the Autobots "comically" hiding from Sam's parents in the Witwickys' backyard. It's not funny, and it likely only drew special effects money away from other scenes that could have further developed the Autobot characters.

    There are a ton of problems with Transformers. And yet, for all its flaws, the bits we get with the transformers themselves are so glorious and jaw-dropping that they make the entire movie enjoyable by extension.
    Transformers might not technically be a great film, but it is, ultimately, a very fun one.

    7/10.



    (written 5/7/07, rewritten 7/1/11)

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